Change your hair, change your life: Special Reader Guest Post

juliaallison:

Change Your Hair, Change Your Life
By Julie Kraut, author of Slept Away

I’m going through what the experts call a quarter-life crisis.  Actually, I don’t have the health insurance to see experts anymore, so I’m just guessing here. But I’m pretty sure I’m right.

Last year at this time, I was living the New York young professional dream: good marketing job, writing career taking off with a book about to publish and another book deal just sold, sweet group of friends, multiple e-vites to binge drink each weekend, and lots of shoes. Sounds awesome, right?  It was.  For four years, it really was.  But after that, something clicked, or unclicked maybe, and I felt stagnant.  My life wasn’t exciting to me any more and I was frustrated with myself for not appreciating just how great everything I had going on was.  So, I decided to make a big change. 

I grew out my bangs. 

When that didn’t have the desired life-quaking effects, I dug a little deeper and made some bigger changes.  I quit my job, left New York, moved home with my parents for a while, and eventually headed off on a three-month volunteer and tourism trip to Africa.  And that’s where I am now, volunteering at an orphanage in Tanzania after spending a month in Mali and traveling around Morocco. I guess you could say I’m living a different kind of dream now.  When put in my New York terms, it sounds kind of lame: I am unemployed…no, wait, I mean, self-employed, write almost exclusively in my journal, don’t have a single real friend on the continent, received one social invitation all month and it was to a bible study (I’m Jewish…still, I accepted), and wear Velcro hiking sandals most days. 

Actually, I’m totally happy with the change, heinous hiking sandal foot tan aside.  But I don’t think that the happiness is really about being in Africa.  I mean, I’m doing well here, loving the hustle and the nature and the culture.  It feels like I’m happy about more than just what’s going on right now though.

I think the happiness comes from knowing that I’ve taken steps to fix something that felt broken.  I wasn’t appreciative of what I had pre-quarter-life crisis despite wanting to be and in my short time away, I’ve already changed that. My definitions of wealth, health, development, and safety have shifted in ways that make my American life seem almost fairytale-like in its good fortune.  And even the super small things I’ve found new value in while here—toilet paper, frosted baked goods, not having my fear of barn yard animals attacking affecting me every single day—are going to play a huge role in recognizing the awesome in the everyday.  I’ve started a list of these little newly precious things so that if I ever do feel myself slipping back into the crisis blah-ness, all I have to do is look at my cheat sheet and remind myself of the glory that is potable tap water or melted cheddar cheese.  Hopefully that’ll stave off another life crisis…at least until I’m middle-aged. 

With this newfound satisfaction and my next crisis not schedule for another 20 years, all I need to put this one to bed are some post-crisis life plans…like a source of income, a place to live, a concrete sense of direction.  Any suggestions?  Re-cutting my bangs will probably be my first step.  I’ll just have to take it from there.

Secret’s out…I’m a Julia Allison fan.  Big time.  This is something I wrote back when I was in Africa and I’m pretty pumped that she posted it now.  Hope you enjoy!