Last night I watched a recording of Joined for Life: Abby and Brittany Turn 16 that was on my parents’ DVR.  (Fine.  It was on their DVR because I put it there.)  It’s a documentary about a pair of conjoined twins.  I started the show with a “check out this freak show” attitude.  But, as I watched the show and saw how happy and healthy the girls were, I found myself thinking “Hey, having a conjoined twin sounds pretty great.”  I’d never get lonely, I’d finally get my chance to have my own reality television special, and I’d have a real excuse for why I haven’t gone on a date in the past month.  Anyone interested in getting sewn together?  I’m available for the conjoining as early as tomorrow.*

*Please note that I’d need to check with Blue Cross to see how much of the procedure they’d cover before committing to the surgery.